i am so tired.

i have been sick, and i mean pretty damn sick, for the past two days. tuesday night i finally guessed that the chill i caught during the day might actually be a fever, and i touched my head and it was burning.

i found a disposable thermometer in the kitchen: 103.0.

i stayed in bed for the entire day yesterday, recalling days of my childhood... i seem to remember being sick all the damn time. my fever went away, and a horrible hacking cough materialized.

i finally took some sudafed and cough syrup last night. i hate taking medicine (more than advil or something) anyway because i inevitably have really crazy reactions. such as last night, when i was awake between the desolate hours of 1:30 and 4:30 am, and i actually imagined that my socks could talk to each other.

they had little faces and everything.

i also (scout's honor! even though i was never a scout) named all 50 states, which probably had the undesired effect of exciting me (it's much harder than it sounds to name all 50 without writing them down!). then i sang the entire album of "beneath these fireworks" to myself, to no avail. at this point it was about 4, and i shut my eyes and breathed very slowly and raspily through my mouth and didn't move, and i suppose i eventually fell asleep at around 4:30. it was quite awful.

anyway, not to plague you with tales of my insomnia. i just hate being sick because it gives me a particular kind of sloppy lethargy, and i cannot stand the aftertaste in my mouth. my brain is wide awake but my eyes are weird and crusty and involuntarily closing, though i already took a nap under two hours ago.

i actually want to do something and i have no energy to do it, and i know that to muster the energy its going to take to haul ass to the computer lab later will require almost a superhuman effort.

grrr. effort sucks.

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